In My Daughter's Eyes

I just love this Martina McBride song. I heard it driving home to see my little girl from a long day of work. It was the first time I have heard it since becoming a mother, so it touched me much deeper than ever before.

In my daughter's eyes I am a hero

I am strong and wise and I know no fear

But the truth is plain to see

She was sent to rescue me

I see who I wanna be

In my daughter's eyes

In my daughter's eyes everyone is equal

Darkness turns to light and the world is at peace

This miracle God gave to me gives me strength when I am weak

I find reason to believe

In my daughter's eyes

And when she wraps her hand around my finger

Oh it puts a smile in my heart

Everything becomes a little clearer

I realize what life is all about

It's hangin' on when your heart has had enough

It's giving more when you feel like giving up

I've seen the lightIt's in my daugter's eyes

In my daughter's eyes I can see the future

A reflection of who I am and what will be

Though she'll grow and someday leave

Maybe raise a family

When I'm gone I hope you see how happy she made me

For I'll be there

In my daughter's eyes

A Trip to K-town and Some New Discoveries

Since returning to work, it has been harder to write these posts. By the time I get home at night, all I want to do is spend time with my Emma and Dusty and then go to bed! It has been harder than I thought adjusting to the return to work. I'm working four ten hour days so that I can have longer weekends with my family. Right now, it's taking a toll. I'm sure I'll get used to it soon, though!

This week I had a conference to attend in Knoxville, so Dusty and Emma came along. There was no way I was going to spend a single night away from my little girl!! We spent two nights, but from the look of the CRV, you would have thought we were going away for a month! Dusty strategically packed the vehicle, carefully fitting in all the necessities from the pack and play, to the swing, to Emma's aquarium play mat! This was her first time spending the night away from home, so we wanted to make sure we had everything we might possibly need. Emma did so well! We were worried she may not sleep through the night in a different place, but she slept like a champ!

In other news, last Sunday Emma made a new discovery - the toys that hang down in front of her on her aquarium play mat or that mommy and daddy dangle in front of her, can be touched!! She was so excited when she made this realization - hitting her little fishies and making them swing back and forth! She's starting to hold her toys too, and exam them while in front of her!

Here is my first attempt at placing a video on here. Hope it works. Not only is Emma playing with her fishies in this clip, but she's also singing as daddy plays the piano. Warning, this video is probably only wildly entertaining to Emma's mommy and daddy! Fast forward as you please.

We Survived

Well, we all survived my first week back to work. Monday night and Tuesday morning were quite rough for me, with a good number of tears, but I found comfort in the fact that Emma was home with Dusty. I knew that she was safe with her daddy and was going to have a great time. I actually did not even call them until the afternoon on the first day! When I got home on Tuesday, Emma and Dusty were waiting for me at the top of the stairs and she gave me a huge, open-mouthed smile. That made my day!! And props to daddy - all the laundry was done, the house was cleaned, bed was made, and dinner was ready. Impressive!

Emma and her daddy had a great time this week while mommy was at work. Here are some cute pictures he captured.

Mommy and Me

Emma, I write this post tonight with a heavy heart. Today was the last day of my maternity leave and tomorrow I return to work. I have such a feeling of sadness deep down inside. I love my job, but I do not want to leave you for one minute.

I have been dreading this day since before you were born. I cannot tell you how sad I am about leaving you. I wish that circumstances were different and I could spend every day with you. I am thankful, however, that your daddy is getting to take some time off and spend with you. I am sure the two of you will have a wonderful time together and get to bond just as you and I have been able to.

These past three months have been the greatest three months of my life. Never in my life have I experienced such joy, happiness, and love as I have with you. From the moment they put you on my belly and we locked eyes, looking at each other as if we'd known each other forever, until now, it has been absolutely the most incredible experience of my life. I'm so thankful that God has blessed me with my little Emma.

I dread not spending every minute with you. From the time you get up in the morning, when I lean over to get you out of your crib and you smile and squirm around in pure delight when you know it's me, to tummy time in the living room, I don't want to miss a moment. I don't want to miss all of your little firsts, seconds, and thirds. It is absolutely killing me. I love you my dear Miss Em. I promise, though, that I will be there every early morning to get my snuggle and your feed in, and every evening for your night time snack and snuggle into my shoulder before you fall asleep.

Thank you Em for these past three months. You have changed my life in ways you'll never understand until you have a little one of your own, and I am forever thankful for you. I love you.

Tennessee Georgia Game 2008

Dusty's Uncle Michael and Aunt Denise hosted the annual Tennessee Georgia Game party at their cabin this weekend. This was Emma's first trip into the North Georgia mountains. What a lovely drive it was, with the leaves changing color and the bright blue skies. We had a wonderful day with yummy food, fabulous weather, and great company! Unfortunately Tennessee lost, but it's OK. Maybe next year. We decided to forgoe spending the night and only made it a day trip for little Miss Em, which ended up being a great decision. Apparently Emma is just like her mother, loves a schedule and hates when she deviates from that schedule. Driving up to their cabin, having wake time before feeding, and napping in a new place, was a little much for Emma. We're learning our lessons!

(and just so you know, I'm blog challenged. I have tried for the past hour to post a slideshow with no success! Any tips?)

Three Months and Counting

Emma Bear! You are three months old today! One-quarter of a year! Wow! Like the first two months, this month has flown by!

You have been a busy girl this month, growing and changing every day. You are nearly 13lbs now and 23 inches long! You still have all of your gorgeous brown hair, which continues to stand on end. Your beautiful eyes are still blue and your eyelashes are growing long. You have perfected your gorgeous grin, smiling all the time. You especially love when we make kissy sounds and stick our tongue out at you! We usually get a wide-mouthed smile and arms flapping! You are still intrigued by both the camera and camcorder, so we have yet to justly capture your happy face. You have truly laughed once. Daddy and I stared in amazement and began acting ridiculously silly to re-create that sound, but we were not successful.

Your sounds are growing each and every day. You experiment constantly with your voice and sounds you can make by moving your mouth around. The other day you found out that you could make an "ooooh" sound with your lips and you were amazed. You have also found a new octave for your cries, making sure we know when you are unhappy!

We think you are practicing to be a little soccer star. You love, love, love to kick things with your little legs and toes. You enjoy lying on your aquarium play mat and kicking the ball and get excited when you realize you have made the jingling noise. When we sit you in our laps facing us, you kick, trying to scoot up our legs. You haven't really begun discovering with your hands yet, other than tasting each and every finger, as well as your first, with your mouth.

You love to dance whenever we put you on the changing table and get a kick out of kicking your legs and making "thump" sounds. When we put you in your crib at night, we can hear the thump thump thump all the way downstairs! You and Daddy have discovered a new game - airplane. You love to "fly" around the house with daddy. You are beginning to enjoy tummy time a little more, but still haven't figured out how to roll over. You sure do lift your head, though. You just began trying to lean your head/neck forward when you're sitting up, as if you're trying to sit up on your own.

We found out this month that you have an allergy to cows milk. Your poor little tummy! I didn't realize how much dairy I was eating until I had to cut it out of my diet. You're good to go now!

Your major milestone this month was sleeping through the night. September 10 was the first time you made it through the night, and you've pretty much been doing it ever since. You also started sleeping in your own room. This was hard on mommy, but we have survived. Another first for you this month was a little road trip with mommy, mom-mom, and omi. We went shopping at Ikea!

Emma Bear, you are an amazing little girl, with such a personality. You are still my wide-eyed baby, taking in everything you can, as you were the day you were born. I thank God for you each and every day. He has truly blessed us with you.

Fall is in the Air!

Fall is my favorite time of year! I've been so excited to share my favorite season with Emma during my last days home before returning to work! There's just something so wonderful about the crispness in the air, the beautiful blue skies, and the rustling of the leaves in the trees as the wind gently blows! I've been telling Emma all about the trees changing color, especially my favorite one near our house. Every year I'm so excited to see it change into its brilliant colors and this year I'll get to see it every day since we've moved back into the area!

My good friend Kristi and I and our little bundles of joy, Emma and Nolan, took a stroll through the park this morning. It was perfect weather! I found a cute little hoodie in Emma's closet. Just as I love dressing in the fall and winter, I've realized I love dressing her even more! Cute little blue jeans, sweaters, hoodies, and more! How fun!

I AM THE CURE

Actually, WE are the cure.

Our little family, in addition to our great friends the Moncriefs, participated in the Susan G Komen Chattanooga Race for the Cure Sunday afternoon. As I explained to Emma while I was getting her ready for her first Race for the Cure, we run today so she won't have to tomorrow. We run today so that women (and men) in her generation will not have to worry about this terrible thing called breast cancer. We run today so that there will be a cure and that one day no woman, man, wife, husband, mother, father, daughter, or son will have to endure breast cancer. One day, Emma. We ARE the cure.

So Emma participated in her first 5K. She did exceptionally well, snoozing (of course) for most of the walk. Brittany, Ada, Emma, and I participated in the 5K walk while Dusty and Jimmy ran the 5K. Our husbands then came back around to meet us and walk the final mile with their families.

After the race, we decided to go load up on carbs at Panera. It was a wonderful, quiet afternoon in Panera, until our clan arrived. We had just gotten our food and sat down to enjoy food and friendship, when I look over at our beautiful daughter - and the mess she had made. Now, I write this not to embarass Emma in the future, but to share this experience of a first time mommy - who was utterly embarassed. Little Miss Emma had just had a snack before arriving to Panera. I had changed her diaper and in the midst of her screams while changing the diaper, did not properly align the contraption. Here she was sitting in Panera, leaking out the side of her diaper - ALL down the carseat. So I slowly begin to freak out, thinking, I can't take my daugther into a public restroom and change her. How disgusting! (By the way, Brittany: Dusty and I realized last night that our car was right across the street, why didn't I just take her out there?!) Anyways, so I pick the child, carrier and all, to go clean her, when there IT is - all OVER the panera bench. It had leaked THROUGH the carseat. My goodness child - I thought. Had you been saving this one up for a week!?! So, absolutely mortified, I clean off the bench, Brittany sanitizing behind me, and rush Emma to the bathroom where I attempted to clean her, the car seat, and change her diaper, all while keeping her in the carseat so she wouldn't touch the germy bathroom. Oh, the joys of motherhood.

All in all though, we had an excellent day, running/walking for the cure and enjoying friends.

Emma - looking good in her shades!

Our little preppy girl in a pink polo - collar turned up and all.

The festivities were just too much!

Daddy and Emma - ready for the race!

Addendum to post: Dusty wanted me to add this...He finished the race in 25:41, a personal best for him, and quite an achievement we were both proud of. However, it was still nothing compared to Jimmy's two-mintue slaughter of the time. He was waiting for Dusty at the finish line, drink in hand for his friend. The positive to Jimmy completing before, Dusty realized, is now he has a personal race attendant. He's driven to run faster AND gets a beverage hand delivered to him at the finish. Thanks Jimmy!!!!!

Serious Miss Em

So many times Emma has a very serious look on her face. It looks as though she's studying us or thinking who in the world are these people!?!? I wonder what is really going through her mind! She's growing so quickly! Before we know it, she'll be telling us exactly what's going through her mind whether we like it or not!!!

Bath Time Fun

Emma is all smiles during bathtime. We've tried continuously to capture that cute open-mouthed smile, but she always stops when she sees the camera! Here's some cute ones we did catch (but still no smile) when we were drying her off in her cute pink bear towel. Drying off is still fun, but when she realizes bathtime is over, she's not as happy! Check out her hair, it has a little curl to it when we dry it, but then it goes right back to standing on end!!

Homecoming

Friday night we attended Ringgold's Homecoming festivities to see Jessi, Dusty's cousin, on the homecoming court. She's a Senior this year. She was absolutely gorgeous!

Emma was in tow, sporting her new blue jeans and riding in daddy's front pack.

The Fan

I've mentioned the "fan" in numerous posts about Emma and as I was lying on the floor with her playing and we were both looking at the "fan", I decided to write a post about it.

If you have ever held Emma anywhere in our living room and she has stared lovingly past you, eyes fixated, this is what she was looking at. Our fan. This marvelous light fixture hangs in our living room, and is quite the contrast on the white ceiling, which is what probably keeps her eyes glued. Funny too, it is practically the only light fixture we like in the house and one of the only ones we intend to keep once our remodel is complete (if complete ever happens!). Emma already has good taste!

It is amazing how something so simple can be so amazing for a little one. Emma and I will lie on the floor playing with her many toys, but the most exciting thing during playtime is that old fan! The one in her nursery is white - maybe we need to change it out! Might make naps more interesting for her!

New Little Friends Meet

Owen Patrick McKenna arrived on Monday around 4:30PM weighing in at 8lbs 2ounces. We went to meet the new little guy tonight. He was so cute and little - all snug as a bug in his swaddling - in that wonderful sleepy newborn state. The new mom and dad were doing wonderful, still in disbelief that this precious little gem was theirs. Here's a few pictures from the meeting.

Boo Boo Baby

Monday was a very traumatic day. Emma had her 2-month old well child visit which also marked the beginning of her immunizations. Four shots the poor little girl had to get. Dusty and I both battled with the immunization decision - not with each other, but with our hearts and minds. We read and read until we couldn't read anymore. Many of our friends said they were at peace with the decision, and that it was in someone else's hands, but we still struggled. My biggest fear was to make a decision that could possibly negatively affect our child and her future. That made me sick. I continuously prayed about the situation, and still, sitting in the exam room yesterday, was not a peace with it, although all of our research and my faith should have allowed me to be at peace. So little Miss Emma received her immunizations, as we felt it was the best thing to do for her, but it was the hardest thing for mommy and daddy. As she received the shots, mommy and daddy didn't say a word - we didn't want her relating us to this pain - let her hate the nurse (silly I know). I stood behind Dusty, and I think with every shot I bawled harder and dug my nails further into his arm. (I'm crying writing this post.) I would have done anything at that moment to take her little pain and screams away. As soon as they were done, I just scooped my little girl up. She was crying. I was crying. What a mess for Dusty. Thank goodness he stays strong. Of course, Emma calmed down in less than a minute. It took mommy much, much longer.

Before you have a baby and while you're pregnant, people continuously tell you that you cannot imagine the love that you will have for the baby. That this love is unlike anything you've ever felt in your life. And, like I did, you agree, but in your mind you're thinking, I know what that feels like because I have the greatest love for my spouse. It must feel like that. But they are right and it's not until you hold that baby in your arms that you feel this love. When Emma was in my tummy, I had an overwhelming love for her, but I also could protect her, so I didn't feel the same love I do now. It's the most unimaginable feeling. Such a strong feeling of love and the need to protect. I truly understand now what people mean when they say they would die for their child.

On a happier note to end this post, Emma weighed in at a whopping 12lbs 3 ounces and was 22 3/4 inches long. She is in the 75th percentile for both her weight and height. She sure does love her milk. As the onesie my friend Kristi gave her - she's a milk enthusiast!! Wonder if she's going to be tall like her daddy?